You shocked me a little on the first night, when I met your eyes as I laid on top of you, actually looking at you, I heard the word that was so similar from my own mouth I believed for a moment I had spoken it myself. A simple word not confusing and with a hint of playfulness but I guess only someone like me knows the meaning. "What" I smiled, actually feeling like the stronger one this time as I made fun of you repeating it to me when I forced you to look at me. I love our friendship, it's not complicated like most relationships are, it's not even a relationship but it's somewhere in between.
Thank you for making me strong. Thank you for just holding me at night, thank you for not leaving when you could easily have walked away when I broke down. Instead you came and laid down with me and I love you for that.
Feelings and emotions, love and friendship it's a fine line for me. Most people don't understand, I actually started to question my own sanity when I read an article. Short but still to this day remember the whole thing word for word. It scares me, casts its shadow along the edges of the good moments and fun times, ready to toss them all aside at a moment's time. I'm scared to search out the truth, because I feel that some part of me is expecting a yes to come out of it while most is just telling me I've over reacting.
The memories of this year, the bad times that still sit along the edges, still teasing me with news I do not want to hear, threatening to tear me down again.
The doctors have given me their warnings but I will never listen. I will never be at the hands of the medical professions if I can help it. Things happen in life that we have no control over. I want to live my life but not at the sake of always having to be on my guard that things could so easily go wrong.
That's why I'm really enjoying working at Rebel. I've gotten along really well with the people there, I have friends, Jordan and Matt mainly but still there is Josh, Steve, James, Georgia, Toneya, Ellie, Kim and some other's I can't remember right now. We have jokes and play them on each other, I honestly love working there
Labels: Friends, Work
So I guess with all things you want to know a little about me then? Sorry to dissapoint you but that's going to have to come later. Right now I'm a little busy to talk about my life but hey look around, read a bit, you might learn something about me you didn't know before.